The Revd Writes…Just before Christmas we had our old dog put to sleep. At sixteen-and-a-half (Jack Russell Terriers are the longest-lived breed of dog.) she’d had a long and happy life, much-loved by all the Baileys. At nine weeks old, a friend sold her to me for £25. I can honestly say that it is probably the best £25 I have ever spent. Lily was worth every penny. She quickly became a best friend to all of us, particularly to my two children. She was always there for them when they needed a cuddle or just someone to chat to who would understand – often when parents didn’t. She never refused to take the Vicar for a walk and absorbed huge amounts of information about the Church and the World, helping to put things into context by chasing a butterfly or tennis ball.The last year saw the slow creep of physical and mental frailty. I’ve not had to manage a dog suffering from dementia before - staring into space and endlessly wandering around in circles. Added to this, deafness, loss of sight and voice, a growing weakness in her back legs and the ‘accidents’ of double incontinence, increasingly difficult to manage. The decision to put Lily to sleep was taken carefully, involving all members of the family. Having collectively agreed in principle that this was the right thing to do to spare our old dog further loss of quality of life, the question then remained as to timing. We needed some space as individuals, and as a family, in which to come to terms with what we had agreed to do before taking the dog to the vet for the last time. We needed some time too in which to say our last goodbyes. Each of us did this in our own way with extra cuddles, a slow walk around the garden, more biscuit treats. Eventually, we reached a place where we all knew we had each come to terms with what needed to happen. We all understood that having Lily euthanised was the kindest thing that we could do for her. And so, it came to pass.On more than one occasion I have been faced with someone who has reached the evening of their years and whose sole wish is to close their eyes and not wake up to face yet another day, languishing in physical discomfort with their world reduced to the confines of an armchair. This can sometimes be a difficult conversation to have. But not always. There are times when it is simply waiting for the body to give up, long after the individual themselves has come to terms with the inevitable.Traditionally, the Christian standpoint has been to acknowledge that all life is a gift from God and that only God has the right to take this gift away. Yet, recent decades have helped us to understand more clearly what it is to die well. The importance, where possible, for the individual to honour the agency that God has given to us in making decisions and choices that holds that in the end all is harvest. Assisted dying, where that is helping someone of their own free will to die well, is a debate that is not going to go away, and one in which we all need to engage with compassion. As someone recently said to me, “Vicar, you wouldn’t let this happen to a dog.”God BlessMark
I am writing to say Thank You to you for all the support and help that you give in enabling the work and ministry of our churches to flourish. Thank you for your time, for your commitment and your money. This past year has not always been easy as the cost-of-living crisis and high mortgage interest rates have impacted the standard of living of many people. As a grassroots organisation, our churches are entirely dependent upon the shared pool of resources that we bring and share together. Thank You for your continued generosity. It is this offering of ourselves that is the hallmark of Christian discipleship, a manifestation of God’s love with which we are blessed and through which, by God’s grace, we bless each other. The result means that there has been much to celebrate over these past six months.Work with our two Church Schools at Ardeley and Benington has continued to flourish. Both schools now use their local church not just as a place for worship and special services but equally as a learning environment. Our churches make for great classrooms in which to learn about RE topics, art and history. It is both a privilege and a pleasure for me to deliver these lessons and to watch as young minds engage and learn to appreciate for themselves the ecclesiastical gems in their midst. Looking ahead, Ardeley School is preparing for a SIAMS Inspection (Statutory Inspection of Anglican and Methodist Schools) in 2024. This is the Church’s equivalent of an OFSTED inspection with a special focus on a school’s Christian vision and values. It has been good to be part of a SIAMS prep group, working with staff to review how our vision and values impact all areas of the life of the School.Much work has also been undertaken by our Fabric Committee at St Lawrence’s, Ardeley. Working with our architect, Helen Axworthy of R H Partnership, we have pulled together the details for a major restoration project, cleaning and preserving much of the stained glass and replacing eroded stonework. This will be the largest project within the Benefice in 2024 amounting to a £100 000 spend. We are hugely grateful to the late Janet Naylor for remembering St Lawrence’s in her will and enabling this work to take place. This project will commence in March and will hopefully, be completed by the end of June. A big Thank You to Jackie Haywood, Churchwarden, for taking on the role of ‘keeping an eye’ as this project evolves.Janet’s gift is a reminder of how important it can be to remember your Church in your will. Even a small gift can make a significant impact in helping to preserve the ancient fabric of the Church, ensuring that it will continue to be here for future generations to use and enjoy. A very special legacy by which to be remembered and for which the present generation will be truly grateful.The restoration works to the Chapel at St Peter’s, Benington has progressed significantly with the added delight of the discovery of new fragments of medieval wall paintings. Rewiring of electrics at the west end of the Chapel has seen a much-needed tidy-up though more still needs to be done in this regard. This project will continue in 2024 and we look forward to the design and introduction of some new oak cabinets. A particular Thank You to Mandy Greengrass, our erstwhile Verger, for expertly re-jigging the Chapel space whilst work continues.Over the Christmas period, significant amounts of fund-raising took place across all of our Churches. Teams of volunteers rallied around the Ardeley Christmas Mingle, Christmas Tree Festival at St Mary’s, Walkern, Christmas drinks at Cottered and the sale of specially commissioned cards at Benington. Christmas time is an important time in helping to raise money for payment of Parish Share (the amount we are obliged to pay to the Diocese to fund the vicar post) and help to balance the books. A huge Thank You to everyone who poured time and effort into these activities - on top of preparing to celebrate Christmas with friends and family at home and away. Where would we be without you?Alongside my work as a parish priest, I have worked for many years in the field of mental health. During the COVID pandemic, I began writing meditative blogs via Facebook and have, since September, begun to do so again. This is an attempt to reach out to those within our own communities who struggle with mental health issues and to those who are caring for them. To date, the blogs have been welcomed by a good number of folks who find them helpful and so, I will be continuing to write them. They appear on a Friday on alternate weeks. If you find them helpful, you might like to mention them to others. Anyone struggling with a mental health issue is more than welcome to become part of any of our church families. ‘Belonging’ and being part of a loving, accepting group of people is an important part of the Church’s healing ministry.From the middle of July until the beginning of November I shall be on sabbatical, researching and writing. Planning for this absence is already underway and I am grateful to Canon Mike Leverton and others who have said that they are more than willing to help plug gaps in our Rota of Services. Another big Thank You to our retired clergy and others who will be enabling this priest to step back from the coalface for a little while.If you think the Church can be of any help to you, don’t hesitate to be in touch!God Bless, MarkMdbailey066@gmail.com 01763 281052Follow our Churches on Facebook for the latest news and details of events!Photograph: Bishop Richard, Bishop of Bedford (Chair Diocesan Board of Education), Mrs Barbara Young (Headteacher Ardeley St Lawrence Church of England Primary School) and Revd Mark Bailey (Priest-in-Charge). Bishop Richard visited Ardeley School earlier last year.
The Revd Writes… “Heaven and earth will pass away, but my words will not pass away. But about that day or hour no one knows, neither the angels in heaven, nor the Son but only the Father.” (Mark 13:31-32) January. A new year dawns and with it the certainty of uncertainty. The world continues its existence in a perpetual cycle of change and unknowing. And it is in this perpetual cycle of change and unknowing that we live out our lives in the day-to-day. And in this curious life we live, we experience a contrast between the generations. Young people, less set in their ways, still in the throes of developing their own identities, are naturally more flexible when it comes to managing change. One example by way of illustration, is the very sharp edge of tech and electronic devices, which seem to me to advance and develop with lightning speed. Young people find this exciting and invigorating and can’t wait for the next new invention. As someone in his middling years, I find myself wanting to stick a bit more with what I know and am quite happy to hold on to that for a bit longer, rather than being continually pushed out of my comfort zone. The advantage of youth, still being a bit less sure as to what an emerging personality might yet evolve into, more willing to experiment with alternatives and hence more open to dealing with change in ways which older folks struggle and are sometimes ticked off for being ‘set in their ways’ - resistant to keeping up with the times. The contrast, however, is that older people, who, by the grace of God, know themselves more fully, are more aware, more comfortable in their own skin, are less phased by the unknown of the younger generation. Tech-savvy kids laugh at parents and grandparents and tell them that they are dinosaurs who have yet to progress beyond the C19th. These same kids run to them when they want advice on negotiating an area of life they are still discovering for themselves - money, love, and where they think they want to go in life but are still not yet so sure. They worry more about what tomorrow will bring; their still developing sense of adulthood not yet quite so able to reassure them. The younger generation filled with anxious bravado, flexible and willing to experiment, laughing at the seeming intransigence of the older folks. The older folks being pushed into the constant change of the new world. Yet more assured, less phased by the unknown, more willing to tolerate the absence of security, find themselves being needed by the younger generation for comfort and stability. In this world, there is the constant of change and unknown. In Mark’s Gospel, the Son must give way to the Father whilst the Father rejoices in the work of the Son. “Heaven and earth will pass away”, the anxiety of the young. “But my words will not pass away”, the comfort of the old. In this constant world of change and the unknown rests the place of faith. The faith of the younger generation in the old. And the faith of the older generation in the young. The young need the old. And the old need the young. At the start of a new year, it is good to remind ourselves that different generations set out together. Better together at negotiating the certainty of uncertainty. God Bless Mark
The Revd Writes… The road from Nazareth to Bethlehem was never going to be easy for Mary and Joseph even with a reliable source of transport that the donkey proved to be – slow but sure. The journey was done under sufferance, a directive by government to partake in a national census. For a young Palestinian woman, heavily pregnant, the timing was hardly appropriate. Anxieties about where they would stay on arrival travelled with them. No Air B & B to book. The journey from Bethlehem was to prove not just hard but dangerous. The story of Herod’s persecution of baby boys, graphically illustrated by the 16th-century Dutch artist Pieter Bruegel in his famous Massacre of the Innocents, fills even the modern mind with terror. The flight into Egypt to seek sanctuary is a detail omitted from Christmas cards and Christmas tree decorations. Even in churches the 28th of December, which commemorates this bit of the story, is often quietly ignored. Yet the gospel text is clear, after the joyous arrival of a first born the happy couple did not return home. To go home simply was not safe. Like all good parents Mary and Joseph put their baby first; the price of becoming refugees was a secondary concern. The journey from Nazareth to Bethlehem and from Bethlehem, in the West Bank, through Gaza into Egypt is a story that has been replayed over the centuries and none more so than at the present time. For many living in the Holy Land, this will be a Christmas filled with the same anxieties experienced by Mary, Joseph, the baby Jesus, and even the donkey. Where is security and resulting peace to be found for both Israeli and Palestinian? For Ukrainian and Russian? In which inn will a human family seemingly unable to reconcile differences, unable to live in a constructive and creative harmony, find a room? The world remains unsafe for many children, women and men and for those living in such unsafe environments there will be little peace to celebrate this Christmastide. For those of us blessed to have warm beds and loving relationships to hold onto our Christmas gift of prayer must be one of empathy and charity. Peace and goodwill are blessings not to be taken for granted. Hold gently to the peace of the Christ Child this Christmas. And may that gentle holding fill you with hope and faith as you share of yourself with others. Happy Christmas. Mark
