Grandparents’ Group at St Mark’s

For three years there has been a Grandparent’s Group sponsored by St Mark’s Church. Though we are sponsored by the church we are open to any grandparents. The group was started because we were aware that being a grandparent today is completely different from what it was when most of today’s grandparents were grandchildren themselves. The life expectancy of someone born in 1911 was around 50 years. Those who lasted longer were visibly getting very old by the time today’s 60 year old or so. Most of us in this group are rather older than that! This means that today’s grandparents are having to invent our own roles without a readymade

blue-print that can work in today’s conditions.

The Grandparents’ Group at St Mark’s began in order to help us learn to be the best grandparent’s we can be, given today’s circumstances. We’ve developed our own ways of working. We meet monthly in one of our homes and begin each meeting with a light supper. We have different ways of working. We always share thoughts and ideas about the kinds of challenges we find ourselves facing as grandparents. For example, how to keep in touch with grandchildren who live thousands of miles away, or how to feel confident in the face of a grandchild’s awesome IT abilities! We share moments of joy when a grandchild has had a great achievement. We show one another photos of a particular event or a particular child we’re proud of. We give space to someone facing a particular challenge, giving them an opportunity to think something through with compassionate support from the others who are there. We don’t do ‘solutions’ – we do give space for thought. We have evenings when a relevant topic is introduced, say about children’s spiritual development. We advise one another about books to read. We are developing a ‘catalogue’ of good places to visit with grandchildren. We keep notes of each meeting, which means that we are building up a record which helps us see how we have been learning more and more about how to be the best grandparent we can be today.

At the moment we have about 16 people on our list, which results in meetings of around 13-14. We are considering the idea of forming a new group. Anyone interested in taking part in this expansion should contact John Bazalgette, the present group’s Convenor. Phone 020 89777, mobile 07432 678 659, email [email protected].