What is the question that we would most dearly like to ask Jesus personally? And if we haven’t yet asked in prayer, why not? Because we can ask the Lord anything, anytime according to his promise to hear. Perhaps you have asked but not heard an answer yet, or perhaps the answer is not the one you wanted. It’s complicated, isn’t it? Also, what about the nature of the question? Is it a selfish one, or is it totally free from any ulterior motive? That would be good, wouldn’t it! Anyway, Jesus was asked a question in today’s reading from Mark’s Gospel, and he gives an answer, although it is not one that is easy to accept. So, what happened? James and John, the sons of Zebedee, came to Jesus and said to him: ‘Teacher, we want you to do for us whatever we ask of you.’ Okay, not so much a request, really, more a demand, rather, I would say. But Jesus is not put off; he just asks them what it is that they want him to do for them. And here it comes, for they said: ‘Grant us to sit, one at your right hand and one at your left, in your glory.’ A request that sounds a bit daring but also a bit flattering. In the same account that appears in Matthew’s Gospel, it is the mother of James and John who asks the question, which gives an extra slant to it all. But in Mark we focus on the disciples themselves. And Jesus does not evade the question; nor does he ignore or dismiss the request. He gives an honest answer, saying that they don’t know what they are asking. Are they able to drink the cup that he drinks, or be baptized with the baptism that he is baptized with? Their response is courageous, affirming their ability, saying: ‘We are able.’ It sounds like they really mean it, but, as Jesus continues, it will not be an easy journey; nor will the reward for their commitment be exactly as they wish it to be. In order to be truly counted as a follower of Jesus, you must let go of any preconceived idea that you can ‘earn’ a reward. And the funny thing is, of course, that our reward is guaranteed, and that it will be exactly right and fitting. I have sometimes wondered who would sit at Jesus’ right and left in his glory. My personal take on it would be that it could well be John the Baptist, or anybody else that showed a level of humility and obedience to God’s calling that is above and beyond. But ultimately it is God’s decision and his design that makes that choice. Does it matter? I don’t think so. I don’t think it is even helpful to ponder the question, as it is beyond our reach. And thankfully it is so; for it helps us not to be taken captive to the wrong kind of thinking. So, we have to be satisfied with the response that Jesus gives to James and John, and through them to all the disciples and to us: ‘To sit at my hand or at my left is not mine to grant, but it is for those for whom it has been prepared.’ It may take more humility to accept that than we are happy to admit; and, in any case, true humility – the one that accepts that we are fallen human beings and saved only by God’s grace – is often only obtained through stumbling and making mistakes, not by being what we might call ‘great’. It is certainly not the ‘humility’ that Uriah Heep claimed to possess in the story of David Copperfield; look it up if you have forgotten. Rather, it is the kind that wholeheartedly sees themselves as a servant, not a master, and that is reflected in Jesus himself, who said: ‘For the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life a ransom for many.’ May we, then, be able to ask Jesus this question: ‘How can we serve you best?’ Amen.
